Recently I had a conversation with a friend who is an amazing interior designer and has a beautiful home. She also has a very popular blog and often writes about things she's changing around, a wall she's painting, or a re-do project she's taking on. She is very creative and has a gift for making something ordinary look beautiful.
(Let me preface that her blog is her business. It's her 'job' to create within her home and then tell the rest of us how she did it.)
About a year ago I discovered the world of DIY (I know, I'm a little behind) and started following many blogs of women who wrote about their homes. It inspired me to do a few DIY projects and to be a little more creative when I thought about what I wanted my home to represent. But for me, it got a little out of hand. And more out of hand in my mind than it did physically. I didn't run out and spend hundreds of dollars on throw pillows, lamps, or wall paintings. I know better than that and my husband would've killed me. But suddenly I had become discontent with my home. I saw pictures of other women's homes and how pretty and inviting they were, and then I would look away from the computer screen to see my blank, boring walls and stained carpets. I wanted to fill every wall with a pretty picture and every corner with a cute accessory. I didn't like our couch pillows or our tacky, gold factory light fixtures. The list goes on and on. I just wasn't happy with my home.
So back to the conversation I had with my interior designer, blogging friend. It seems people decorate their homes for two types of reasons...
1) Because they really enjoy it. It's a creative outlet. They are gifted at it.
2) They don't like the way their home looks. They are discontent. They won't be happy until it's "perfect".
I would put myself in the second category. At times I do enjoy decorating and creating but I wouldn't say I have a specific knack for it. I was constantly looking for more "things" for my home because the way it was just wasn't good enough. I suppose it's ok to be discontent sometimes if something needs to change but the reality for me was that we didn't have the money for me to be unhappy with our home. Our financial envelope system does not include a 'home decor' category. Unfortunately.
So what did I do? I stopped. I stopped buying things for my house every week. I stopped thinking about what I "needed" next. I stopped spending hours looking at blog posts of beautiful homes and comparing theirs to mine. I stopped thinking about all the things I didn't like about my home and started being content with what it was.
It's a place of safety. It's a place of comfort. It's a place for laughing and for tears. It's a place for building memories. It's a place for growing. It's a place for friendship. And my hope is that it's a place where there is an abundance of love and forgiveness.
I do believe having a warm and welcoming home is an important thing but it is not THE most important thing.
Here are some questions you can ask yourself if you relate to this at all...
- Does the question "what do I need to buy next" consume your thoughts?
- Do you spend more money on buying things for your home then you do on other people?
- Does your desire to decorate come from passion or discontentment?
I am not in love with our current home but I am happy with it and I choose to be content with it.
How do you feel about your home?